After a week in the city of Chandigarh and twelve days to count away from home and away from S, I, and my parents I am struggling; immensley. Being in the city I was fine (after the initial shock of madness.) I couldn't understand why I had been told that this would be hard and so very different, I was still waiting on culture shock to rear its ugly head.
Currently I am fucking worried as S has found out some terrible news. He works for an NGO called New Light who provide care and eduction for children whom's parents are sex workers. Last night one of the protitutes tried to kill herself and burnt 95% of her body. She is in hospital, but cannot talk with her lips burnt together and a body that is unrecognizable as a human S said.
As I was texting back when I found out this new my phone died and while you might say well whoop de do massive deal city slicker get over it, I was worried to death about how he was feeling about such a sight, and with power cuts so big there was no telling when the power will come back on to charge the phone. Many people will never experience this in their lifetimes, and while S does not regret it he also does not know what to make of it either. It is not something you can really draw conclusions about but I shall try my best.
In trying to help someone through something like this and after much research (yes I did use google...bff. Jay but sez but jay- it's a pj sorry) loved ones aren't the best in helping others deal with things like this. We expect much from them when really no one is equipped to deal with such a thing, let alone give advice on it. But of course we try. Heartless beast if you didn't! (Sorry, admittedly trying to bring some humour into such a dark entry.)
For S I think the part that is probably the hardest about dealing with this is the fact that no one can really relate to such an event and in India this is a relatively common occurance and therefore makes it easy for many to brush off like they have seen it all before. It saddens me that the human soul can become so nummb to such tradgedy and loss like this. But in saying this is not uncommon in the 'Untouchables' it does not make it any less valued as the probable loss of a life.